Hospice is GREAT!

It's true what they say about Hospice........... they are wonderful!
Mom has a very nice nurse, her name is Dar. She's young, vibrant full of life, funny, witty, calls mom Nana.

Her aide's name is Tina. She is abit older than Tina. She gave mom a bed bath yesterday.... Hmmm, mom wasn't too receptive of that. She didn't give her any problems, but just wasn't too sure.
I have changed more dirty diapers on Mom the past few days than I have since she got sick.

Oh well.


She is very comfortable to sit and watch tv in her room, in her bed.... I wonder does she watch TV all night and then want to sleep all night? Oh well, does it matter? NOPE.



The boys have been over to see mom, with the kids. Steven has been coming to see her too. Janet and Daniel came over wednesday. Mom was happy to see them. It's the little things that makes her happy.



Ok, now for me to launch into bitch mode. In October when mom had her heart attack and pneumonia, she spent 11 days in the hospital. Everyone came to see her........
Ima,Kathy, Donnie, Darrell, Janet, the kids, the Aunties,.
When I told Mom Donnie, Ima and Darrell were coming to see her she said and I quote:
They either think I am dying or they want something!"

Well now that she is really is........ hmmm they don't come to see her. Maybe they might if I answered their calls. I just can't go there. They have no clue! It had been 13 months since Ima had seen her, 2 yrs for Darrell and almost 3 for Donnie. They all LIVE locally.. with in 10-15 minutes from us. They are all healthy, able to walk, drive..... think clearly, eat, drink and be merry! She is not! Some one said .........Your mom lead a good life!
Well did she really?

She had a hard life after my parents divorced in 1974(?) But alot of it was her choosing, some she had no control over.

I'm hoping I will be able to get this out of my system soon..... I have sadness, I have resentment, I have anxiety!
But I will be ok..............

Life comes at us with a vengence sometimes

Sometimes I don't think we really know how to handle situations.

Life just seems to come at us full force.
Mom is declining steadily every day. She lost her ability to walk. All I can do these days is cry. Alicia is crying too, we are all crying. It is so sad to watch her just die. It is so unfair.
My Sister and Brother are grieving, my children are grieving. My granddaughter is grieving.

Mom doesn't quite know why everyone leaves her room in tears. Maybe she does know... but she shows no emotion ... NONE! She doesn't cry, she seldom giggles anymore, she does rub her mouth when too many people are in her room, talking over her.

I have everything settled and in place for her now... I can go back to work, and give my all.

Hospice is in place, IIAM has been called and in place, Alicia is prepared to take over during the day and I will do it in the evenings when I get home.

Life comes at ya fast! That's for sure!!!!!!!

The Aguayo Family: Hospice is in Place#links

The Aguayo Family: Hospice is in Place#links

The Aguayo Family: Hospice

The Aguayo Family: Hospice

Sure makes ya think..........

Today has been a crazy day with Mom. Started out..... she just would NOT get out of bed. No how, no way, she didn't wanna! Ok, she's not a big woman, but she is steadily gaining weight ... so short of just picking her up and making her, I resort to tactics..... haha..... Leeky, go get your Mama. Wow! First try......... it work!!!!!!!! I guess she figured 2 against one..... she was out numbered. And she was.

what makes her want to stay in bed all day, she doesn't really sleep, maybe she dozes off and on, but why stay in bed? She decides after she gets down stairs, after a while, she just wants to diconnect her feeding tube...... to go to the bathroom. WHAT???????????? You can't just un plug it! You have to flush it, turn the pump off, and them you can get up.

Oh my........ this has been a day that's for sure. She did eat pureed pancakes this morning. Thats a first in a long time. Jaiden ate some too, he loves it. YUCK. I like to chew my pancakes thank you! She has also decided she now wants to drink all day........... well not with out THICK IT involved.......sorry!
Again, what is she thinking? Has she forgot she just can't get up? She cant't drink plain water, or liquids of any kind??????????
UGHHHHHHHH 2 weeks from today........ I go back to work. God give me strength

The Aguayo Family: Sadly.........

The Aguayo Family: Sadly.........#links

Outside Caregivers ...... :(

So the time came when Mom had to have someone stay with her during the day so I and my daughter could go to work.
I truthfully do not remember the gals name, and I should try really hard to remember..... she was horrible. She did nothing for mom except cook her breakfast and lunch. No laundry, no dishes from the meals she had prepared, never made mom's bed. I asked Mom one day..... what does she do all day? Sit outside, smokes and talks on her cell phone. It was July, the end of watermelon season, I had to make a decision...... do I stay home with mom or continue with this gal?
I quit my job well, took a leave of absence, to care for mom. It is amazing. When I do things like this it's a gut feeling I need to follow. Mom started having small strokes... every 2 months, she had one for about 6 months. Then in May I decided I would go back to work at the farm to work Watermelons. My aunt stayed with Mom while I worked. I did this for 2 yrs..... only the last time I worked at the farm I decided to stay. I needed more income and I needed health insurance.

My aunt care for Mom for about a yr. My daughter decided then she wanted to stay home to be her caregiver. She was layed off of her job, so of course.....
This was fantastic!
I will say this......... my aunt, my dad's sister, took wonderful care of Mom. I will forever be greatful for her help. My parents divorced many many yrs ago! She loves my mom and Mom loves her too. She is always delighted to see the "Aunties".

Mom had bouts of anger with my daughter, granddaughter. She would hit Leeky with her cane every chance she got, my daughter too. Her cane was thrown out in the garage more times than I care to count.. haha But just like everything else, that went away.
She never went there with me..... maybe she seen me as an authority figure. Who knows what goes on in the minds of people with dementia.